Mom. Wife. Military Life.

It’s not a secret that Japan was not the top place on my list of places I wanted to live. In fact it never really was. When we found out we were moving here I had a full on panic attack. Im talking head between the knees, call my momma in a panic, holy shit it’s happening kinda moment.

When we found out we were moving here I got in touch with a friend of a friend, who after some pestering and questioning, ending up stepping in as our sponsors. For those of you who aren’t familiar with overseas moving in the military, they offer you a family who essentially steps in and helps arrange things for you during your move. Book hotels, run you around to find cars to buy, help set up cell phones, even buy you a set of groceries that is waiting for you upon arrival in your temporary living. When we arrived we had a handful of friends we had known from our previous station and our kind sponsors even had a little get together with everyone while we were settling in.

For Thanksgiving, which just happened to fall a few days after our arrival on island, our sponsors-turned new friends hosted a huge Thanksgiving as a joint celebration with her neighbor. I remember her telling me “Yes, my neighbor is so sweet, we decided to go ahead and have this Thanksgiving together just so it’s easier for everyone, it’s going to be great”. Honestly, I was just gracious that anyone would go out of their way to host a new family to the island. So as we got ready that day and headed up to their house, we ending up going up this hill (or tiny mountain) to this neighborhood that sat quietly tucked away from the rest of the base. You wouldn’t know you were there unless someone guided you. As we walked into the Thanksgiving dinner, I met the neighbor my new friend had told me about and thanked her for having us. I walked into her backyard and remember being enamored. You could see out across these rolling hills into Japan, with a HUGE tree that stands in her yard. All the kids running in and out of the house down to the park,  running free as can be. I remember looking at my husband and thinking, how the hell can all these kids run around like this and no one is worrying?! (Japan, that’s why.) It was a glimpse at my future before I even knew it was.  We still had not been assigned a house yet but I remember leaving that evening and my new friends pointing across the street and saying “They have been working hard on B over there, maybe y’all will get that! That would be so cool”. Sure enough, a few days later God had a plan a gave us that house and we were picking up our keys to move into the heights’.

With it being our first year and Christmas away from family (ever), it was super important to me to have a house decorated and ready to go. I went to the BX and bought a tree, lights, a few rugs, presents, wrapping paper and headed up to the house by myself and started going to town so the next day when my family came home, they would in fact have a HOME to move into. As I sat there wrapping in the quiet I felt this sadness in the pit of my stomach and just started missing home. In that exact moment my door bell rang, I had no idea who knew I was in the house or how, but it was my new friend and her neighbor that had hosted Thanksgiving. They had a bottle of wine and 3 plastic cups. I teared up immediately. Their timing was impeccable and they didn’t even know. We sat that night talking until 12am about life, and when they left that evening, I knew I had found my people and we undoubtedly made the perfect decision in moving up here.

We were the first few up on this little block to connect but through time have been blessed with neighbors that just began to trickle in, and without question, we got to watch God place his puzzle pieces together through each new family that moved in. We would vet our neighbors as the older families that had been here moved out. When the empty house next to us was finally done my other neighbor and I would text back and forth about the families and go out and “run into them”… don’t judge me, I know you all do the same thing. There was a particular woman I saw one day, I went out and talked a bit and knew she had to be our neighbor. I text my other friend that day and told her they were coming back to look that evening. When they arrived to take a look we were both outside and all talked for a bit before they decided to say they were moving in. We hit the jackpot because they were just another puzzle piece to throw into the mix.

We have a park that sits in the middle of the houses that has seen us in tears because we have been confronted with horrible situations that comes to light at a vulnerable moment. Tears of laugher that come rolling down our cheeks in the most unpredictable moments. That park has been ripped down and rebuild (with our initials carved in the wet cement that lies below the padding). A pavilion that has watch us order pizza on more nights then we can count because the kids are having so much fun and the wine is tasting so good that its not worth leaving. The kids play until the moon shines bright or until it gets dark enough that we start worrying about Habu’s we can’t see (hahaha). The basketball court that has watched ALL of our babies learn to ride 2 wheel bikes. The new mom friends you meet and love to run into. We all know who’s babies belong to who and get excited to catch up on traveling adventures, lend support to someone who’s spouse may be gone, or just share a glass of wine because they need it. That park had become the Mecca of the tap-out. “Im done parenting right now, please go run it out with the neighborhood kids so momma doesn’t loose her shit tonight” and as a community, we are all ok with that.

We as a community have been there for each other through the pain. The pain of loosing a family member and not being able to go home to be there when you feel like you need to be. A card that shows up on your counter, a bouquet of flowers waiting on your porch with a card reminding you that prayers are being sent up for strength and healing. The pain of loosing animals. Going through loss and sadness a world away and feeling helpless only to have a neighbor show up at your door with a warm meal and hug letting you know you don’t have to walk through it alone.

We have been there for each other through sickness. Running into each other’s house in a full panic when a fever has gotten to high or a lip has been busted and everyone just assuming their positions knowing who to help, what babies to shuffle where and when to just stop in the moment and boast a calm “It’s ok, we are getting this taken care of”. A bottle of motrion shows up on the counter or a friend taking their lunch break to swing by chicken noodle soup and sprite because #StomacheBug. (Those get left of the porch though cuz, love ya mean it, but don’t want it).

The community husbands never let us down. We always joke that somehow they work it out so at least one husband is around to do the honey-dos. They always step in to mow the lawns. Teach us how to make our damn fire alarms shut up when the battery is running low. Break off door knobs to the bathroom when the baby locks themselves in there (and housing dosen’t give us keys for the door) . Cook us dinner on nights that he knows we all need a break cuz we DONE, DONE. Help break down patio furniture and store it all away because typhoon season means Mother Nature is a moody one and I don’t want to give up my comfy patio unless I absolutely have to… oh, and I’m scared of the man eating size of the huntsman spiders that camp out in it. To aerate our wine. To play with all the neighborhood kids because everyone’s dad has been gone A LOT. To have lunch and actually step in as a dad figure sometimes because all of our amazing husbands are also friends and know that their friend appreciates them being there when they can’t be.

My back porch is a place that knows all. A place that became a place of refuge and where the drinks floweth over, grilling is aplenty, and many wise idea’s bloomed.  Vacations, daytime adventures, parties, that porch knows all. It has seen tears of pending goodbyes. It has seen so many bottles of wine that it would make a winery jealous. It has seen some of the best last minute get togethers you could imagine, my favorite being the bring-your-own-pool party. Thats right. We blew up a bunch up pools, filled our coolers, grilled some meats, and swam and drank until the water balloons got broken out and an all out war began. Easter dinners, post wine-night conversation, and absolutely no theme at all, my porch has seen it all.

Our last 3 years here have been life changing.

Emotionally. Financially. Physically.

We have watched our whole neighborhood mature. Our toddlers are kids. Our kids are young adults. Our husband’s mature through their careers that are ever changing and high paced out here. Our friendships naturally bloom into a family tree that we are so blessed to have away from everything we ever knew. We, here in the heights’, have more love and support then I could ever put into words. As lonely as it is living across the world, up here we have a family. We aren’t perfect, but we love that and embrace it. We have safety, we have community. We have something that if you only get to experience it once in your lifetime you are blessed, and we all have.

So to all the families we have had the privilege of living with, loving, and becoming a family these past 3 years, wether it be my park mom-friends, my neighbors who come join us on the patio for drinks, my friends that I welcome into my home, I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate you. You have been a piece of my life I will never forget. This little community at the top of this hill is a tiny piece of heaven and a secret refuge that all of us have had the privilege of experiencing together. So for the new families carrying on the reigns, remember to extend your home and your heart, it moves forward here with you. To the families that have been here with us and recently left, I carry you with me and am grateful for the gift of the community.

So although we have a couple months left, we are slowly closing this chapter and this is a chapter that will be in bold and italicized for me for sure. I have been gifted lifetime friendships here and I could not be more blessed to call y’all my neighbors and friends!

I love you, Heights’ folks, and I promise to take this community love onto our next chapter.

Inspire. Believe. Succeed.

-Kinzy